Just a moment, please, And maybe we will see, A better time and place, A better day, perhaps. Stop, and look around, It could all be there. Every single detail, Could give an answer, Every other person, Could prove a friend, And every single place, A home in the making. Take a chance, And look around, And see what might be. There could be more, Or nothing new to see, But give it a chance, And see what just might be.
There stands the hero, Upon his public pedestal, On display for all the masses, An example for the children. No smile on his face, No fire left in his eyes, His heart has lost the battle, His spirit has lost the fight. Too long the eyes have followed him, Too large the stack of mail, The endless stream of interviews, Everyone follows in his trail. He has sold what once was sacred, Left behind his initial goals, He got caught up in the glory, Now he simply fills the role. But who's to blame for this? Is it him or is it us? We ask for a model to follow, And we'll give him what he wants. Enter small-town good samaritan, Exit empty hero, goodness lost. We have taken the hope for the future, And made a poster-boy without a cause.
The hard table provides no relief from the day. I simply sit here as the world runs by through my head, and I realize that there really isn't any hope, any future that will count. I have already wasted too many hours this same way, with my head on this hard gray table. It is for this moment my own, but before now it has been a rest for countless more. It is a graveyard, a cemetery for the minds and hopes and aspirations of the youth--of tomorrow. Mine is the newest headstone, but by no means does it stand alone; many cracked and crumbling granite markers are all that remain of numerous youthful existences. There is no hope, this resting place will simply continue to consume students without a fight, without a chance to survive, until every plot is filled and a newer, more efficient means of subduing the future opens and begins to fill. It continues and expands and grows and evolves, and all while I sit here doing nothing, allowing all of it. But what am I supposed to do? I am simply another victim, there is no fight, no hero here, I have now powers or special attributes that the others before me have lacked. I am simply aware of it, which makes the process that much more painful and difficult to endure. There is nothing I can do to fight it, my purpose seems simply to know it and record it.
Incoherent revelations, Scattered through the subway stations. The knowing but unknown, Legacies of the underground prophets, Scratched into the ancient paint, Cracked and peeling, Or spray-painted over, Fresh and new. They quietly go about their business, Unappreciated, Often condemned. The troubled man, The greater mind: A vandal, Simply trying to put his unease to rest.
And yet, as I say all of this, I am myself forced to question how much of it is true. I haven’t really found any long-lasting answers, I just keep searching. From time to time it all starts to make sense and seems to be running smoothly, but that never seems to last. Generally, these brief times of clarity arise from interactions with the people around me—from the relationships with all of the different people that enter and depart from my life. But to say that most of these of clarity arise from interactions and relationships, it is important to also acknowledge that most of the difficult and dark times are caused by the same two things. It is difficult to understand how the highest and lowest times in life are often engendered by the same things, but it’s the truth. And if you truly consider it, it just means that when the things hat really matter are going well they can turn everything around to the bright side, whereas hen those things that really matter start to go wrong, it can cause you to forget all of the good things in your life. That is also to say that the things that really matter have the greatest range of ups and downs. I guess this is simply necessary, and completely acceptable. It’s all a part of what makes them important, and makes it possible for them to be as good as they are at times. With placing a high value on something, comes a genuine and often realized risk that is simply a part of the cost. But no matter what, the point is that these times of clarity are indeed brief and result from contact with other people most often. And without any doubt, I can say that these are not the answers to life’s many questions, but simply momentary reprieves, false and short-lasting relief. So my search continues, and I’m still as far away as when my search began.
In both Under the Banner of Heaven and Eiger Dreams, author Jon Krakauer explores the ways that obsession affects people, although he does so differently in each work. In Under the Banner of Heaven he gives an account of how two religious fundamentalists were led to commit murder because of their obsession; while in Eiger Dreams he tells the stories of many different people who have been obsessed with rock-climbing, including himself. And although the two books may on the surface appear to be completely unrelated, Krakauer links their stories with a common theme, one that has forced him to delve extremely deep into his subjects to understand them. In each work he gives clear and well-researched insight into the motives and justifications behind peoples’ actions. This insight appears as a subtle, but detailed commentary on the reasons for, and the implications, meaning, and results of obsession.
It was March, 1984 when Ron Lafferty received the revelation. He was to remove his sister-in-law Brenda Lafferty and her baby, then Chloe Low, and finally Richard Stowe so that God’s work could continue forward. He consulted his brother Dan, and after much praying, they both agreed that the revelation had indeed come from their almighty master. Only a few months later, on July 24, the brothers entered the home of Brenda Lafferty and proceeded to brutally murder both her and her fifteen-month-old baby daughter Erica. The rest of the revelation was never carried out; however, two lives were taken, and two men have had little difficulty in admitting to the heinous crime that they committed in the name of God. Under the Banner attempts to explain how these two religious zealots had so little difficulty taking the lives of two individuals on faith alone.
In Eiger Dreams, Jon Krakauer explores completely different subject matter, describing some of the most prominent figures, both human and geographic, in the world of mountaineering. John Gill, Andy Embick, Adrian Popovich, Rick Fisher, the Burgess twins, and of course himself are just a few of the mountain climbers mentioned, while Denali, Everest, K2, and the Eiger are just a few of the mountains. The stories are filled with glory and success, but also with fatalities and defeat. These are the harrowing adventures that keep pulling people into one of the sports with the greatest fatality rate; although it can be said that perhaps it is actually the fatality rate itself that draws much of the crowds. Eiger Dreams attempts to explain to the non-climbing world why climbers climb, and why it is such a consuming lifestyle that few have given up by choice.
In these two books, Jon Krakauer explores two obsessions, and in doing so, he attempts to explain the causes behind them. In Under the Banner of Heaven, he describes how the Lafferty brothers became so hopelessly involved in Fundamentalist Mormonism, and in Eiger Dreams, how climbers, himself included, feel and must succumb to the call of the mountains. It can be observed, in each, a major factor that contributes to such fixations as one’s upbringing; the Laffertys were born into a family that relentlessly studied and lived the Mormon faith, while many of the mountain climbers he follows were either born into a culture that idolizes the accomplishment of such feats as have been dubbed insane by many or introduced to the sport at an early age. Generally these people also demonstrate similar personality traits; they are people who firmly believe in their obsessions and through incredible strength and daring face them head on. In addition, Krakauer describes some of the things that have fueled his own obsession, and it would seem that there is truth in his statement for both mountain-climbers and religious fanatics:
And if I remain in the dark about our purpose here, and the meaning of eternity, I have nevertheless arrived at an understanding of a few more modest truths: Most of us fear death. Most of us yearn to comprehend how we got here, and why—which is to say, most of us ache to know the love of our creator (Krakauer, Banner 339).
That is to say, that obsession is often caused by the need to understand existence and to find purpose in life; it is often an attempt to find answers to the greatest questions that people have. There are many reasons behind extreme fascinations, but what Krakauer emphasizes is that it is generally simply an aching to comprehend what humans are doing on this planet.
In an attempt to further understand what Jon Krakauer is writing about, it is important to know what exactly obsession is, since it can mean many different things as is demonstrated in these two works. Obsession is defined as being a persistent, disturbing, preoccupation with an idea or feeling; a definition that very accurately describes what is described through the Krakauer’s stories of the Laffertys and numerous mountaineers. In Under the Banner of Heaven the obsession of the Laffertys is over religion and their belief that they were chosen by God to do his good work and to remove any that stand in the way of that being accomplished. In Eiger Dreams the obsession of the many mountain-climbers is with personal accomplishment, testing physical limits, cheating death, and of course competition. As Krakauer himself said in an interview,
I was stirred by the mystery of death; I couldn’t resist stealing up to the edge of doom and peering over the brink. The view into that swirling black vortex terrified me, but I caught sight of something elemental in that shadowy glimpse, some forbidden, fascinating riddle (Contemporary).
A quote that can alone reveal much of what his obsession with mountains is all about. It is something different for everybody, but whatever it is, it’s always a persistent, disturbing, preoccupation with something.
To fully understand the obsessions described in these two books, it is important to examine how Jon Krakauer’s subjects justify their extreme fascinations; but first, it is necessary to study some of the results. In Under the Banner of Heaven, the two Lafferty brothers’ obsession with faith led to the murder of an innocent woman and her defenseless infant daughter, while in Eiger Dreams, the obsession of numerous rock-climbers led to severe injuries or in many cases, death. Presented with these results, the task of justifying anything that could lead to murder, injury, and death, would appear to anyone as very daunting. Even Krakauer himself admitted, in an interview when questioned about his own near-death experience on Mount Everest as a member of an expedition that lost some of Everest’s biggest names,
I guess I don’t try to justify climbing, or defend it, because I can’t. There’s no way to defend it, even to yourself, once you’ve been involved in something like this disaster. And yet I’ve continued to climb. I don’t know what that says about me or the sport other than the potential power it has. What makes climbing great for me, strangely enough, is this life and death aspect. It sounds trite to say, I know, but climbing isn’t just another game. It isn’t just another sport. It’s life itself (Contemporary).
But, despite the fact that he claims he doesn’t try to justify climbing, or obsession in general, this statement alone is enough to explain why he climbs, and if that’s not enough, in each of his works he further explains how people can justify their fixations. If people couldn’t validate their own obsessions, how could they let themselves become so immersed in them?
In regards to validating such extreme fixations as fundamental Mormonism that led to murder, Krakauer does his best to describe how his subjects justified their monstrous acts. During his research on this particular subject, Krakauer asked Dan Lafferty if there is any difference between him and Osama bin Laden, to which he replied,
I’ve asked myself that. Could I be there? Is that what I’m like? And the answer is no. Because Osama bin Laden is an asshole, a child of the devil. I believe his real motivation isn’t a quest for honesty and justice, which maybe were his motivations in his earlier life. Now he’s motivated by greed and profit and power (Krakauer, Banner 317).
Following which, Krakauer continued by inquiring as to the difference between what bin Laden’s followers did on September 11, and what he did on the July 24, 1984. His reply was, “I have to admit, the terrorists were following their prophet. They were willing to do essentially what I did. I see the parallel. But the difference between those guys and me is, they were following a false prophet, and I’m not” (318). Through this interview, much insight into the minds of Laffertys can be gained. It is apparent that they justified their actions simply by believing completely and unquestioningly in their faith and eventually in a revelation that would lead to murder. They each believed entirely that they were right and that anyone who disagreed was wrong; theirs was the only true religion: Mormon Fundamentalism. Another interpretation of how the Laffertys justified their crime, though, refers directly back to the historical roots of the Mormon faith; according to Malcolm Jones, “Brigham Young preached that some sins were so heinous as to justify the murder of the sinner. This ‘blood atonement’ was the justification the Laffertys used for their murders” (Jones). This is to say that Brenda Lafferty and her daughter had themselves committed unforgivable sins against God, which necessitated their removal. In these ways, Krakauer’s Under the Banner of Heaven attempts to explain how two men could justify an obsession with faith so strong that could lead them to murder two people.
When it comes to justifying extreme fascination with mountains, Krakauer often refers back to his own personal experience, but all in all, in Eiger Dreams he describes a mindset and a lifestyle of people who simply are drawn in by the lure of mountains. As he admits in his Author’s Note to Eiger Dreams and in numerous interviews, it is very difficult to explain to a non-climber why he and his peers risk life to experience the nature in her most raw and unforgiving manner. So to do so, he writes that in this book he simply tries to prove that, “most climbers aren’t in fact deranged, they’re just infected with a particularly virulent strain of the Human Condition” (Krakauer, Dreams x). As he describes it, mountain-climbing really is a lifestyle, a lifestyle that certain people are inclined to follow up and become addicted to simply because they were born with that need for close-calls and the ever intensifying adrenaline rush. The obsession with climbing is an all-encompassing fascination with testing and breaking limits for the ultimate experience of living. To Krakauer and most climbers alike, these reasons are more than enough to justify their fixation and far outweigh the risks that often overshadow them. As he writes further along in his Author’s Note to Eiger Dreams, “by the age of eighteen climbing was the only thing I cared about; work, school, friendships, career plans, sex, sleep—all were made to fit around my climbing or, more often, neglected outright” (xi). Would someone who has trouble validating his obsession admit to that?
Jon Krakauer writes as someone who has truly lived and experienced this world. He can do this because he has, which is because from the age of eight he has had an obsession, a persistent, disturbing, preoccupation with climbing. Whether it be with climbing or with a fundamentalist religion, most people know what that preoccupation is all about, because most of us have a fixation of some sort. The two that Krakauer describes in Under the Banner of Heaven and Eiger Dreams are extreme examples, but in picking extreme examples, he was able to explore them to a more extensive depth. The truth is, most of our obsessions will never lead to murder or death, but they will lead to the great feeling of satisfaction and accomplishment that also accompany any fascination. As Krakauer wrote in one of the articles published in Eiger Dreams,
The insubstantial frost feathers ensured that those last twenty feet remained hard, scary, onerous. But then, suddenly, there was no place higher to go. It wasn’t possible, I couldn’t believe it. I felt my cracked lips stretch into a huge, painful grin. I was on top of the Devils Thumb (Krakauer, Eiger 184).
We have all known that moment and experienced that feeling of success when our obsession with something leads to our goal, and it is that moment that we all live for, no matter how long it takes to get there, and no matter how painful the journey, when we get there, it has all been worth it. The truth is, the theme explored in these two works is one that we can all apply to our own life no matter how different the circumstances. In writing these two books, Jon Krakauer has added a chapter to the quest for understanding one of the world’s most common themes by discussing the reasons for, and the implications, meaning, and results of obsession.
